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Nocturnal Genius, Diurnal Violence
Why are they (armed) patriots at Cliven Bundy’s compound in Nevada, but (unarmed) rioters in Ferguson, Missouri?“What you’re trying to do is make something that structurally maps the text. So if there...
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Racism is Not a Stain on the Soul—It’s Something You Do
In the events of the last few days, it’s important to insist on the primacy of one fact: the events in Ferguson, Missouri, all flow from the shooting of Michael Brown, an unarmed black teenager, and...
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Terrifying Horror Stories in which the Cheerleader Lives
I read Young Adult literature, in theory, for work. I sell books and write about them in equal measure, and stories about teen girls have become my beat. Knowing what’s big and popular in the field is...
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Hue and Sigh: The Drab Palettes of Modern Superhero Movies
Contemplating the state of the modern superhero movie is probably one of the activities destined for me in hell, which might explain why I ended up doing it on a 12-hour-long flight last week. At a...
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Why the Internet Needs Zelda Williams: An Open Letter
Dear Zelda,You don’t know me but I feel as if I know you, at least online. That’s not as creepy as it sounds. It’s what the Internet does best: connect us. We know that Robin Williams valued family,...
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Hue and Sigh: The Drab Palettes of Modern Superhero Movies
Contemplating the state of the modern superhero movie is probably one of the activities destined for me in hell, which might explain why I ended up doing it on a 12-hour-long flight last week. At a...
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Why the Internet Needs Zelda Williams: An Open Letter
Dear Zelda,You don’t know me but I feel as if I know you, at least online. That’s not as creepy as it sounds. It’s what the Internet does best: connect us. We know that Robin Williams valued family,...
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Is It Weird That A Stranger Brings Me Lunches?
Got a problem that’s got you feeling fucked if you do, fucked if you don’t? Send us your concerns and questions and Unfuck Yourself. Do things look a little…different to you this week?Are you noticing...
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The Satanic Service of Fireflies
“The real Satanist is not quite so easily recognized as such.” – Anton Szandor LaVeyThe room was quiet, save for the whirring of computers and the occasional bang from the autoclave. Her hair was still...
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The Bleak Depths of BoJack
The one-line description of BoJack Horseman sounds a bit like a failed Cards Against Humanity joke (“joke”), rolling around in the humour rut of ’90s nostalgia and celebrity culture. BoJack is an...
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Diamonds in the Rough: A Central African Shell Game
Gary Blatt is now a Johannesburg leather-goods dealer in his early forties, but in a previous life he was the hero of an H. Rider Haggard novel. Twenty years ago, he went in search of King Solomon’s...
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Brutally Absurd
Here’s a familiar story. In the early ’50s, in Prague, the writer Lenka Reinerová was arrested and put in solitary confinement. She didn’t know why. When she asked, she was told, “You know better than...
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Such A Laugh As One Might Fancy Satan Uttered
In 1845, an anonymous writer was nervous about going to a party. “The night was somewhat dark, and as the gates of the asylum closed on us, and we drove along the thickly-hedged avenue which leads to...
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Keys Open Doors: The New Pornographers’ Brill Bruisers
Sometimes the joke overtakes the story. When the New Pornographers released their first album of jubilant power pop with Mass Romantic 14 years ago, they were frequently and facetiously described as a...
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The Importance of Adult Classifieds
My favourite examples of sex worker advertising are from Pompeii, which was destroyed by a volcano in 79 AD and then recovered over a series of digs in the 18th and 19th centuries. Pompeii was a...
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In the Company of the Dead—an Interview with Michael Crummey
Last month, Nicole Cliffe—unapologetic Canadian and co-editor of literary/humour/miscellany site The Toast—published a list of “Every Canadian Novel Ever.” One-line summaries like “Will the Cod Return,...
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Our Pet Queen
There’s no easy way to say this, but our cat is not very nice. This might not immediately appear relevant, but stick with it.Really, he’s a miserable cat. As far as he’s concerned, people are things to...
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Two Vessels
Previously published in the Summer 2014 issue of the Hazlitt print edition.You are an immaterial entity aboard the vessel of a body, which is aboard the vessel of a universe, which is traveling through...
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